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Sex And The City: Why can’t they work on their relationships?

I saw Sex and the City yesterday.  

It was worth the $8.50 (I went to a matinee.)  But, I have to admit, I was a little disappointed.  It just seemed like the story lines were so simplistic.  


Charlotte and Harry are obviously happy, which is great.  (She chose a “good guy.”  :) 

Carrie and John (I didn’t know Big had a name) struggle with his commitment issues.  They don’t really get addressed, but at least they find a way to make it to the altar (eventually). 

But, what really bothered me was the way they approach the other two relationships.  After Steve’s affair, Steve and Miranda’s only options are to break-up or “move on without looking back.”  And for Samantha and Smith, it’s break-up or stay in a relationship that compares to “chemo.” 

The movie makes it clear that Steve and Miranda have deeper issues that led to the affair.  And Samantha and Smith are dealing with his long work hours and no sex life.  

Both couples have “issues” that need to be worked on, but the movie doesn’t explore them.  So, Miranda chooses to “move on without looking back.”  And Samantha leaves the relationship. 

Samantha believes she’s just not meant to be in a relationship.  When maybe, she’s just not meant to be neglected, in a relationship.  And Steve and Miranda don’t really deal with any of the things that led to the affair.  So, what’s gonna prevent them from having trouble in the future? 

I know it’s Hollywood.  And I know I think too much.  

But, YOU KNOW, I want to hear what you think…

Vonda (“Vondie”) Lozano, Ph.D., is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Certified Hypnotherapist. She’s been featured in Cosmopolitan, the Wall Street Journal and on KABC Talk Radio. Vondie offers hypnosis, counseling, and workshops in Ventura. Nearby cities include Camarillo, Ojai and Oxnard.

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  • Tameeka

    Hollywood is like a drug for many where only happy endings are allowed. It’s made to keep us in a euphoric state of mind. I saw Sex and the City on opening night and mostly identified with Carrie at the point where she’s all excited about marrying Big and then at the point where she’s terribly hurt at his not showing up for the wedding. The hurt and frustration that came with being stood up was all too true, yet they did not show even a glimpse of the process where the two of them work through their issues. It was all subliminal. Big did give small signals during the wedding preparation, but Carrie was so caught up in the oohs and aahs that she was oblivious to them. When Carrie asked what he wanted regarding the wedding, he simply stated, “I just want you.” I learned an important lesson in that instance. We should listen intently to our partners. There may be a resounding message in the little thing(s) they are saying. Miranda and Steve’s situation was definitely not realistic. No woman today is that easy to forgive and move forward with her man after an affair. They could have used your help, Vondie ;-)

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